Love— 5 Minutes of Pleasure For a Lifetime of Pain - by Ayesha Rehman

‘I love you’. Oh, how many of us long to hear those words. Long to find ‘the one’, to fall in love. Dream to be proposed under the Eiffel Tower in Paris and to live happily ever after.

To fall in love, perceived by many as obtaining eternal bliss. For when you're in love, everything’s great, right? You’ve won. Won at life, won the fight against your demons. Your life’s no less than a cliché rom-com. The sun shines brighter and every day feels like a holiday. The sky is blue, birds are chirping and not a single worry in the world.

But soon the sky breaks out and thunder erupts. Flowers are wilted and darkness looms upon the air. Yeah, that’s right, you’ve snapped back to reality.

In the words of my favourite pogue from Outer Banks, ‘Love is 5 minutes of pleasure for a lifetime of pain’. Wise words for sure. For love has you all swindled up in its ways making you feel special as if you’re floating through space. But guess what? It all comes to an end. Sooner or later, you realize that the clouds you were floating on were full of lightning. And the lightning will strike leaving you empty, in the darkness. This is the epitome of love. Non-existent. For love is simply a bubble in your head that can burst any time, any day, and you will be left to wallow in your misery, to face the world on your own.

Relationships for instance, how many are based on pure love? The type we’re all smitten by in movies? One that is free of the evils of this world, free of envy, free of rage. There are people fortunate enough to find their true soul mate but what about the majority of the population who are deceived and misled by their supposed ‘significant others’? And of course, love at first sight. We’ve all read about it, we’ve all seen it in movies. Eyes lock, sparks fly and you’ve found your one true soul mate. However in reality, often the person we’ve locked our eyes with is an ominous serial killer, secretly planning our murder.

‘The Titanic’ for instance is a movie that apparently depicts true love in its best form. Rose and Jack fell in love the moment they laid eyes on each other. Guess where love landed them? Dead, in the cold ocean. Let’s take other movies as examples, ‘10 things I Hate About You’; the guy tries to make the girl fall in love with her only to break her heart in the end. ‘A Walk to Remember’; Landon Carter and Jamie Sullivan fall in love. Ultimately, she passes away due to cancer leaving Landon anguished and tormented for the rest of his life. ‘Five Feet Apart’, a tragic hospital romance with the most sorrowful ending. In this case, falling in love is so dangerous that it can lead to the death of the characters. And how can we forget, ‘Me before You’; Louisa and William fall in love only to have William commit suicide towards the end. However, the title, Me before You, truly does justice to love. Even when in love, people continue to be selfish and put themselves before others. The end is always devastating for love is only a flamboyant idea in our heads. Truth is, there is no true meaning to love beyond movies and books.

To look towards the positive side, all love is not dead. There is the eternal love of family that goes above and beyond because the most important thing in life will always be family, according to Vin Diesel at least. That is love that you can count on forever. Soul mates, not so much. Of course, if you’re lucky enough to fall in love with a vampire or werewolf, then there is hope! For the love of a supernatural being is far more meaningful than that of a mere human.

Over time, the idea of love has made us believe in happy endings and ever after. However, we tend to forget that love does not bring joy. It is merely a distraction that drifts our attention away from our real aims and true purpose. Which is to conquer mountains and make something of ourselves. Falling in love is for the weak, chasing your dreams and living them is what makes you strong.

At the end, when your hearty life is coming to an end, you shouldn’t be asking yourself if you fell in love. In fact, what truly matters is the impact that you’re leaving behind. Did you look after your family? Were you a kind and generous human being in your life? Did you follow your ambitions and fulfil your dreams? Finding love is not the end-all, be-all of our lives. Finding peace and being content with the person we have become is.

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